If you see me comin' you skidaddle;
You go flying up a creek without a paddle;
'Cause my daily itch is to make you sick;
And if you hang around, I can do my schtick.

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I know when I show up you wanna scatter;
Tell the truth it really doesn't matter;
You folks just wish I'da disappeared;
But I'm not nasty, just really weird.

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Crazy like a dodo but sweet like a donkey;
Look like a hobo and I smell kinda funky;
Grin like a troll and cackle like a monkey;
I'm THE GUNKY!...THE GUNKY!!

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The only time you want me near is 'never';
But I know you think I really kinda clever;
Things I do make you wanna smile;
You find my creepy but you dig my style.

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Wacky to the knees and wired as a junky;
Kooky as a banshee, but smarter than a flunky;
You want me as a friend, but you find me kinda skunky;
I'm THE GUNKY!...THE GUNKY!!